Day 5. It's the small victories. The best thing about tonight's class was my exit out of the second set of rabbit. Rabbit and I are not friends… My spine is not as flexible bending forward as I would like and I find rabbit pose to be very challenging. But none the less I give it a go and struggle hard to breath and round my spine, but as hard as I try my forehead still does not touch my knees. I finally heard….(I'm sure they have been saying this the entire time, but this is the first time I really "heard"it) …pull hard on your heels as you come out of rabbit really making room and stretching your spine. For a brief moment I felt my spine opening just the slightest amount. Victory! Subject change. I am really tired of looking at myself in the mirror. I had a really difficult time concentrating in class today. I was very distracted by my yoga shorts. I looked around and feel quite self conscious suddenly. There were only a few of us that have on shorts made for bikram. Most had on long pants….no idea how they do that. So hot! Should I also be wearing long pants? I used to think my bikram shorts were cute. But having only two pairs alternately every other day I am getting tired of seeing them over and over again even though it's only been a few days. I go online shopping in my head during class wondering what cute shorts I can get and how long it will take them to get here and what brand I should buy…slying looking around to see what some of the other girls are wearing for comparison. Then my top comes into view…I have only two cotton tanks that I also alternate. I am really thinking that I should be investing more money in my yoga clothes at this point. Should I? Is it worth it? Should I get the special tops made for sweat? Wait! That's not what yoga is about is it? My head is full of words! So during all of this my yoga goes on auto pilot. But I finished the class with a small victory at least. So much for my steadfast focus. Maybe next time.
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